Thursday, May 29, 2008


i got an email from someone today. the email was an attempt at comedy, but i didn't even crack a smile while reading it.

it was supposed to be an email conversation between some couple. a girl (who cheated) and a guy (who has a "hilarious response"). according to his response, there was some kind of weak justification on her part...which makes sense. there aren't many people who can operate without the aid of some sort of scapegoating for their actions.

still...i felt that old soreness creeping back into my body.

there's something about that soreness that i do actually find funny...although not in a "ha-ha" kind of way. when i first got hurt i figured i'd just work through it. eventually i would heal and it would go away. oddly enough (or maybe not) it never did. it still hurts. i read that email with the feeling that this real or imagined girl could shove her fake apologies. all those sensible assessments and gracious compliments were just a means to an end.

they were just a way for her to not feel guilty anymore.

is anyone who steps out on a relationship truly sorry? do they just think they are?

i don't know for sure, but my gut tells me their regret only runs as deep as their guilt. they're only sorry they got caught. when they were inches deep in the damp comfort of the act...they were certain that the bliss they were feeling was right. it had to be. when they were pulverizing your heart for a cheap orgasm, you never crossed their mind. they wished you were never in the picture, they wanted to "get back" at spit in your face as some kind of retribution for what you supposedly did to them.

so chivalrous. L-O-L.

let's be real for a second. it was about a nut. you (the cheaters) know it, i know it. sometimes you didn't even GET the nut. pathetic.

but it begs the question...why do people who cheat think it's not cheap?

why do they put their actions on this pedestal? as if somehow the laws that govern monogamy should be thrown to the dogs because of their...connection. *le sigh*

give me a christ-punching break.

what these "people" believe is so nonsensical. if you have such a connection, why couldn't you break it off with you current (in)significant other? why couldn't you use the same restraint that us normal folks use when peer pressures like drugs and alcohol enter our lives? fuck it, when other people interlope in our relationships?

i might respect you more if you just admitted that the only power you had was good pussy.

here's the truth as i see it. there are 2 kinds of people in the world we're in...

you friend through all seasons, and seasonal friends. no different with lovers.